still in booty camp

Will this harmonica end up in a toilet or my pants?  I’ll never tell. I called on my way home from work after the first day of Owen’s blitzkrieg potty training to ask what was for dinner and got something like, “Whatever you fucking bring home or can find, ok?” […]


booty camp*

This arrived in the mail this evening, as our 2-year-old boy has to learn to use the shitter this week, or we’re out a few thousand dollars in preschool tuition that we started paying this summer. I tried to pawn the task off on my mother before dropping the kids […]

children, Military


Me:  Did y’all talk about anything that happened in the news today at school? Maddie:  No, we never talk about stories from the news at my school. Me:  You didn’t hear about a guy named Osama bin Laden? Maddie:  No.  I don’t know who…I don’t know that person. Me:  Well, […]



This is what greets me every morning when I wake up and shuffle into the kitchen to feel my way toward a bowl of cereal (or, as of late, a couple of eggs):  a chair from the dining table, pushed across the floor and around the bar before stopping just […]

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