Him: Do you have a lot of experience with trucks? Me: The last time I drove a pickup truck was in high school, when I worked for my friend’s dad’s landscaping company. He had a 1970-something white piece of shit truck with “3 on the tree” and a spare tire […]
No, I’m not talking about the extra something you get for going into the VIP area of a Canadian strip club; I’m talking about what I’m not. Home improvement projects for the past 16 years that I’ve been a grown up (i.e., out of undergrad) have meant paying someone. With […]
My first experience officiating a wedding was full of frustration, anxiety, and chest pains. Primarily, this was because I’d lost my iphone the preceding Thursday night around 3am at a DragonCon hotel party after partying like this and like this while dressed like this: I don’t always drink margaritas, but […]
Last weekend, I was in Guntersville, Alabama with my friend Chad, who was there for a triathlon with his family, and I asked him about his tires. I was looking at his race bike, but he got all kinds of defensive about how he knows he needs to replace the […]
“What would you like to do for your birthday?” we asked her a month ago. “A unicorn party!” she exclaimed. I wasn’t exactly sure what this would look like or entail. So, I figured it meant putting rainbow-colored balloons and a unicorn balloon on our mailbox. And a “pin the […]
