a meme, an award, and a giant johnson

That damned South Carolinian, Bennie, sent this meme requiring an immediate self-aimed picture, but I ain’t playing.  I’m supposed to pass it to 10 folks, but in looking over the acrimonious response he got from the female bloggers he tagged, I’d rather not.  So, I’ll make it voluntary.  If you’re a cool kid who sat in the back seat of the school bus and screamed obscenities out the slide-down windows at the pretty girls who’d just disembarked, feel free to play along.  Otherwise, continue being a pussyboy and sit near the driver.

I also learned I’ve received some love from Brian, aka Unfinished Rambler:

bloglove

I’m not sure what this means, but I think it means Brian and I are BOTH HIV FREE!  Hooray!  For that, I’m grateful beyond dollars.

And finally, I bring you a picture I’ve wanted to take for the last several years every time I drive from Atlanta to Guntersville, via Attalla, Alabama:

giantjohnson

You can’t see it, but there’s a little asterisk at the bottom of this store’s signage.  Next to it are the words “credit goes to Father Muskrat for allowing his alias to grace our storefront.  Were it not for his giant johnson, we’d be called ‘Fred’s’ or ‘Piggly Wiggly’ or something equally craptastic.  He is, dear shoppers, the original Giant Johnson.  Thank you.”

giantjohnson2

Honest.  It says just that.  And you’re welcome.

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12 Responses to “a meme, an award, and a giant johnson”

  1. In THAT case, the least they could have done was sent you a picture instead of making you drive clear the hell out to wherever it is to take a picture yourself. And what are you doing driving around at 4 o’clock in the morning because that is what time it must have been to get an empty parking lot for a place that sells GIANT JOHNSONs.

    Margaret (Nanny Goats)’s last blog post..It’s My Blog and I’ll Cry If I Want To

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  2. muskrat says:

    NannyGoats, That’s a damned good point! They should’ve sent me a picture. The lot was empty b/c it was about 9pm on Christmas Eve. Everyone was more concerned with stockings and wrapping than they were Giant Johnsons. Foolish, foolish people.

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  3. When I was young, I sat in front by the driver– with my trombone. When I was older, I moved to the back of the bus, does that count? ;)

    I knew when I presented you with this award, you’d turn it into comic gold. Thanks for not proving me wrong.

    unfinishedrambler’s last blog post..For Auld Lang Syne, yadda yadda

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  4. muskrat says:

    UR, Was that a rusty trombone by chance?

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  5. Pretty Bride says:

    This blog has become all penis, all the time.

    I like it.

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  6. Jim says:

    Well, they can’t be that giant… I can’t see them in the store windows from there.

    Jim’s last blog post..He Blogs, She Blogs

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  7. Sherri says:

    I just wiped out my entire comment as I’m pretty sure it was offense to gays, unicorns, gay unicorns and Gary Coleman.

    So instead I’ll say: Nice award!

    Sherri’s last blog post..“Hey, Why Don’t Youse Guys Play Some Real Music?”

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  8. UR, you were a ‘boner?? awesome. me too.

    and i would think that if people were concerned with ‘stuffing stockings’ at that time, there would have been a mad rush on the Giant Johnsons!

    seriously, you with the penises.. heh

    ChurchPunkMom’s last blog post..10 Things Tuesday

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  9. Brother says:

    I’m going to start a grocery store chain called, “Ginormous Meat Swords”.

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  10. muskrat says:

    PB, Dirty. Dirty Dirty Bride.

    Jim, Great point! False advertising at its worst.

    Sheri, I’m offended that you erased your offensive comment.

    ChurchPunkMom, You AND Brian were ‘boners? How ’bout that. Y’all should do a concert or something and invite me.

    Brother, Please do. I like that kind of thing.

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  11. A Free Man says:

    All I can say, really, is that there should be an apostrophe somewhere on that sign.

    A Free Man’s last blog post..Laying round in bed on a Saturday morning

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  12. Miss says:

    You JUST posted that on your blog. OMG.

    I’m settling in ok? Dont start being all crappy and not funny. I hate getting up when I get comfortable.

    Thanks.

    Miss’s last blog post..Weekly Winners [Dec28/Jan03]

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