A few hours ago, I got an email that included a nice article on how often young children need affectionate touching from their parents. It talked about needing like 12 hugs a day and how rubbing feet can be good for teens. It made me want to give warm affection to all the little screamers occupying our extra bedrooms.
The email came from Emily. I’ve known Emily since I was 14 and figured she’d find my response humorous:
Thanks for sending this! As you know, I used to LOVE touching the neighborhood children, but after more than five restraining orders, that shit had to stop!
A few hours later, my bride was seated beside me on her MacBook going through her email.
Her: Did you see that nice email from Owen’s teacher today?
Me: No. They must not have my email address. Was it important?
Her: It was about hugging your children. Healthy touches, etc. See? I have it here in my inbox.
Me: No, that email came from Emily! I wrote her a funny response…
Her: Owen’s teacher is named Emily. His new teacher at his new school. Whose opinion of our son and us is important.
I don’t even know how to fix this. Our plan is for my wonderful bride to “say something” at drop off tomorrow morning.
To be continued…