My first customer participant in the Friday confessional is supposed to be anonymous, but, looking through this screen, it appears to be…yes…it sounds like… Bee?
Bee: Back in my youth, I, like Katy Perry, kissed a girl and I liked it. What should my penance be, Father Muskrat?*
FM: Wait. Are you talking about this Katy Perry?
Bee: Is there another one?
FM: I…is it hot in this booth? These robes just don’t breathe for shit nearly as well as synthetic fibers should. Did your boyfriend mind it? I mean, did you like it?
Bee: I already told you. I liked it.
FM: Oh my. Are there any pictures? I mean, little pitchers–were there any? Did any children see you? Cause I’d hate to have to force you to wear a millstone around the neck.
Bee: It was in my youth, as I said. No children. Just…passion. And two smooth faces with soft lips, touching one another.
FM: You don’t mind if I just throw this fucking thick ass warm robe over the side of the booth do you? Okay good. I think you should bring Katy with you for next Friday’s event, so that we can explore this phenomenon further. You know, make sure it didn’t “take,” since I want you to maintain a happy marriage with Mr. Bee. In the meantime, please refrain from giving in to your prurient interests for the next several days, and lastly, I need you to grab your ankles for what I hope is the first of several spankings. And then, get on out of here so I can have some time to reflect on this act and, um, meditate.
*This is the only sentence actually provided by Bee. The rest is Muskrat poetic license. If you’d like to participate in next Friday’s confessional, please email me with your transgression(s) at muskratblog[at]gmail.com