This poster hangs in our powder room. So, whenever Maddie the Toddler and I are in the den, and she belts out an “Oh go potty!” we see this poster. She’ll sit on the john while I hold her little shoulders to keep her from falling in, and she’ll point to Darth Vader and say, “Scary, Daddy! Scaaaaaary!”
And I’ll say, “What does Darth Vader say?”
And she’ll say, “Looooook, I yer fodder.”
I thought it finally time to explain to her the lore of Star Wars, hoping to alleviate her fears a bit–you know, see if it’s true that we fear what we don’t understand. Have a father-daughter moment. Relive 1977.
So, once she’d flushed, we stood up and stared at the poster ahead.
Me: “Maddie, that’s Darth Vader, as you know. And that’s Luke, his son.”
Maddie: “Darff Bader son Luke.”
Me: “And that, that’s Princess Leia, Luke’s sister.”
Maddie: “Princess?!!! Like Snow White costume?”
Me: “Yes, like Snow White, but less susceptible to guile. And, as we learned at Jabba’s hideout, better looking.”
Maddie: “Princess Leia more pretty than Snow White?”
Me: “Look here, this is the Wookie.”
Maddie: “Poppy’s dog Wookie!”
Me: “Yes, your grandfather’s dog is named ‘Wookie,’ but this is Chewbacca the Wookie.”
Maddie: “Okay Daddy.”
Me: “Okay, so which one is Luke’s sister?”
Maddie: (points to Chewbacca)
Me: “No, baby, that’s their friend the Wookie.”
Maddie: “Luke’s dog…is Wookie.”
Me: “Something like that.”
Maddie: “Darff Bader is Scaaary.”
Me: “Yes. Yes, he is. I think we’ll conclude our lesson here, where we started.”
At this point, we adjourned to the den, where I searched for Darth Vader videos on YouTube and found this:
It worked. Darth is not quite as scary as he was. If trying to show him as a family man failed, at least portraying him as a conductor made of legos succeeded.
This post’s “shout out” goes to SciFi Dad, who, I’m certain, has had numerous conversations with his little ones about this subject matter. And, as always, support Father Muskrat and his friends at this website full of funny blogs!