Gratuitously offensive Rants

an endorsement: public urination to show discontent


Since Congress apparently only listens to us for one big vote and then swaps pork favors for votes a few days later to give the American public its middle finger, I’m advocating a return to the era of civil disobedience.  If our coin is going to be commandeered every couple weeks and then pissed away and overspent to the tune of negative one trillion dollars this year alone, then why not retaliate a little against the entity doing the stealing?

Accordingly, I’m leading by example by traveling to Washington, aiming my Johnson, and pissing all over the Internal Revenue Service.  Yes, that’s really me, and yes, I really did christen the IRS building, just down the street from the Washington Monument, on a cold Sunday a couple Februarys ago.  And you know what?  I’m glad I did.

I helped pay for it.  Might as well mark my territory.

I encourage others to do the same.  Go Tyler Durden on someone’s ass.   And why limit such reactions to going number one?  Be strong, blog readers.  Be decadent.

Where do I anticipate finding the bulk of my followers?  Over there, at these funny blogs.  Look for the dogs and fire hoses.  Don’t forget to buy the soap.

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  1. Dude! Tyler Durden is a god! I’d pee myself for him. okay, so TMI. but I am wondering about the pic, is that your best side?

  2. ChatBlanc, At the time, no, it wasn’t my best side.

  3. avatgardener

    Ticked tourist taxpayer tinkles.

    Subversive citizen suggests shitting somewhere sensationally sensitive. (say it, it works)

    Whining whizzer washes Washington with whiskey waste.

    Possibly potted and peeved ‘payer publicly pisses past-potables protesting politicians and policies.

    (potted = somewhat drunk, which I suspect you were.)

  4. What, you mean to tell Rickey that being taxed three times over on your money is a bad thing? Rickey’s just glad to live in an age where the U.S. dollar is worth 74 cents. You should be too.

  5. This actually boosts you up a few notches in my book.

  6. And if I would have had my coffee already I would have thought of some witty metaphor. But I haven’t. So I didn’t.

  7. punkrockdad


  8. I couldn’t make the trip to Washington D.C., so I just went #1 on my tax return before I mailed it.

    You can go #2 on your return, but then they can’t read it, and you end up just having to send another copy.

  9. Doug, That is a brilliant nugget of advice! A steamy, disgusting nugget, I hope.

    PunkRock, Glad you agree!

    Meg, Thanks! I need a boost. And “turbo boosts” hurt (KITT has bad shocks).

    Ricky, Isn’t it more like 45 cents? I’m an ingrate.

    AvatG, I think these are your best!

  10. Pretty Bride

    I remember this day well. It was cold, I was trying to control my shivering as I held the camera while simultaneously looking over my shoulder for the fuzz to come and snatch us all up (and relieve us of our parenting). The steam rose from your fresh whizz, my darling, and the sun broke out from behind the clouds. It was a good day to be an American.

  11. Haha I like Pretty Bride’s Remark 🙂

  12. Scott Covert

    This sounds vaguely familiar, like the people that post 140Mph motorcycle rides on U-Tube.
    Don’t get caught dude! Anarchists UNITE!!

    No wait…

  13. Pretty Bride, your devotion to husband and country know no bounds.

    Sarah, Me too!

    Scott, Join me! We’ll rule the Empire as father and son.

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