Gratuitously offensive

a weekend roundup of additional white trash lit

Encouraged by a barrage of request-filled emails and comments wanting more, below are additional highly-recommended sources of “teaching moments” for you and your progeny, compliments of the Muskrat library:

1) He Don’t Mean Nothin’ By It:  My First Book on Domestic Violence. Learn what Daddy means when he says, “I done told you twice!” as a condition precedent to delivering the backhand!

2) Form over Function: A Pictorial Guide to Ribbed “Wife Beater” Tank-Tops. More than just a means to an end for displaying tats!

3) The Gauntlet: Why Daddy’s Inoperable Cars Litter our Lawn.  Believe it or not, they’re not just your playground–they’re also a great place to get high or fornicate!

4) Gettin’ that Relief Check: My First Book on Welfare Fraud.  Sure, Mommy could get a job.  But why the hell would she want to do that?

5) Sheep in No Clothing: My first Book on Bestiality.  Why is Daddy always visiting Farmer Dan’s yard at night?  And, why does he itch so badly when he gets back?

6) Beyond Bigfoot and Gravedigger: My First Book on Monster Trucks.  When size matters most.

7) The Litigation Lottery:  Turning Your Lawsuit Into a White House with a Walk-In Closet.  How you can turn your hunger and poverty into a sympathetic picture to show a jury of your peers after a feigned accident–complete with referrals to unscrupulous shysters!

For more literature fit for a trailer park princess, check out these funny blogs!

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  1. Do you know where I can get a copy of “The Litigation Lottery…”? I gotsta’ get paid!

  2. avatgardener

    Litigator lists library.

  3. avatgardener

    Lawyer laments lack of lexicon.

    Radical Rednecks read.

  4. A couple of more you may want to look into:

    Homemade Fireworks : Because God gave you a spare eye, and patches look cool!

    Peterbuilt Homeschooling : A practical guide to educating the young’uns when the only place you have to live runs on diesel.

  5. very nice.

    i’ve always enjoyed “Lurleen – Mommy’s Special Friend”

  6. Doug, thanks for the tips! I’ll hunt those on today!

    Julius, I always liked Mommy’s special friend, too. Especially when they’d wrestle.

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