Today, Pretty Bride made the mistake of leaving me alone with Toddler for several hours while she ran some errands. As she drove away, I was sitting on the front porch with my Thinkpad; Toddler had just removed her diaper and was having some bare ass time on the porch swing.
Toddler: “Daddy, need potty.”
Me: “Like for real potty or just talking about going potty later on?”
Toddler: “Uh huh.”
Me: “Okay, when I finish reading this post, okay?”
12 seconds later, after seeing a puddle under the porch swing (pictured above):
Me: “Baby, did you spill your drink?”
I picked her up and realized she’d pissed through the porch swing onto the porch.
Toddler: “Sorry, Daddy. Had to go potty.”
We spent the rest of the morning enjoying some “barefoot and underpants free” time in the driveway.
Then she colored a library book that wasn’t a coloring book.
And I spent some quality time with my shadow.
All in all, not a bad way to spend a Saturday morning before the first college football game starts at 12:30.
If you don’t like spending Saturdays with the SEC, check out these humour blogs all day!