Sarbanes-Oxley, I’m not a fan. Granted, I don’t practice securities or regulation law, so I don’t know much more about this piece of governmental meddling oversight other than what y’all know: that it was created to stop corporate raping of shareholders, a la Enron and WorldCom and HealthSouth and Adelphia, and that it requires a lot of extra auditing and paperwork. For me, this means I have to review a stack of invoices nearly every day–invoices that a secretary should have to review (and used to review). Any time the government requires my extraneous signing of documents, and I can’t bill it to a client, said legislation can touch my bottom.
When SOX started, our office manager gave me a special folder labeled “invoices” and said I had 48 hours to review and sign them.
Office Mgr: “For SOX.”
Me: “What the hell does the Clintons’ cat have to do with this? Shouldn’t it be dead now anyway?”
Office Mgr: “No, silly person! It’s Sarbanes-Oxley.”
Me: “Remind me the next time I’m in either Maryland or Ohio to take a big shit on Senator Sarbanes’s or Representative Oxley’s front porch.”
So, fellow Shareholders of Large Corporations’ Stock, SOX can eat a dick. Well-educated white men will always be greedy. Having a lowly attorney sign the back of every invoice that comes through his practice group won’t do a damned thing to prevent this.
Pictured pulled from this fine blog’s writeup. For apolitical humor (sometimes), check out these funny blogs!