a caption contest from the 1948 “national guard manual basic”

My grandfather gave me his National Guard Manual, according to his handwritten inscription, on August 5, 1997 and wished me “a lot of happy experiences in the National Guard.”  It has sat on a bookshelf for over ten years until last weekend, when I flipped through it for a bit to put off some work.  Page 119 features the following picture:

I was amazed at how happy these guys look to be on their way to kill, so I figured I’d give you good folks a few days to come up with some humorous captions (a la Diesel) and then I’ll reveal the actual caption at the end of the week (which is also fairly amusing).  Whoever comes up with the most amusing caption in my estimation will get their avatar buttfaced (i.e., bare ass sat upon) by the Muskrat Toddler.  If that isn’t enticing, well then, you people aren’t nearly as twisted as I’d hoped and are welcome to stick your middle fingers up your asses.

The best caption writers, by far, write at this funny blog.

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  1. Kid – see this bayonet? Show me up and I slice your head off. Its that easy.

  2. When sightseeing in foreign countries, be sure to observe their customs and try to blend in.

    that’s a good start, I’ll have more later.

  3. Hee hee. That English chic will never know it was me that gave her VD.

  4. Deep in the wilds of the Poontang Valley, his men experienced the joys of a frontal attack.

  5. (Ignore the last post, he’s not asking a question -oops)

    “This is what I’d do-o-o-o for a Klondike Bar.”

  6. “I don’t know, but I’ve been told, toddler asses are mighty cold!”

  7. I’m so glad I go to HHS, I’m so glad I go to HHS, I’m sooooo glad I go to HHS, singing glory hallelujah, I’m so glad!”

  8. Trench foot schmensch foot! Come on Chet, hurry up! I don’t want to miss the invasion!

  9. “As a National Guardsman, you’ll have a chance to participate in flood relief operations.”

    Acorn King, what’s that, the cadence for the Air Force Pedophile Squadron?

    Which reminds me of this caption contest.

  10. AHHHHH! The Crotch Rot! Cut it off with this ! NOOOOOOOW!

  11. summer clearance

    I was going to leave ya an obscure, pep rally-related comment but Bob beat me to the punch…couldn’t have said it better myself.

  12. Boom-Shaka-lakka-lakka! Boom-Shaka-lakka-lakka! Boom!

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