09.30stuff white people dislike: appreciation of culture
During Black History Month, we learn about what those whose ancestors came from Africa have brought us: soulfood, jazz, church services in which the congregation shouts back at the preacher, stop lights, and peanut butter.
During Hispanic Heritage Month, we learn about what those whose ancestors came from Mexico or Spain brought us: art by Picasso, the phrase “mi casa su casa” (which doesn’t always mean an invitation to do heroin), discernment (i.e., knowledge that Taco Bell is to Mexican food as prostitution is to marriage), and the ability to breed cars with pickup trucks.
But what about white history? We got Columbus Day. We learn how western Europeans gave Native Americans smallpox and other loathsome diseases, drafted treaties that were never meant to be kept, and mastered the art of “caveat emptor” while buying islands like Manhattan on the cheap. In short, our cultural relevance is in being assholes.
So, happy October, amigos and peeps! Go find a non-white person and rub some botulism on his mouth.
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For blogs that aren’t anti-white, check out these funny blogs.
Hey. We Irish did something cool with snakes. Or something. Anyway, bitchin’ parade.
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October 1st, 2008 at 8:23 AM
Asians gave us bound feet
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October 1st, 2008 at 1:39 PM
But at least we White people got some damn good comedians and bloggers to poke fun at our assholiness.
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October 1st, 2008 at 5:16 PM
White folks: figure skating and baseball
Black folks: Purple drink and fried chicken
Hispanic folks: regatone and gooooooaaaaaaaaaaallll!!!
A mi me gusta el futbol.
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October 2nd, 2008 at 12:26 AM
Yeah, whitey doesn’t get much, does he? Doesn’t white history month fall on the same month as “eat cheese in the bathtub” month?
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October 2nd, 2008 at 8:05 AM
Caucasian curses Columbus.
lame. off my game this week.
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October 4th, 2008 at 12:46 PM
Shield, I think y’all did! Irish have given our culture much, and they get one day to celebrate it in March, of course. Don’t go askin’ for a full month, though.
Brother, Thanks. And shouldn’t your handle be “Little Brother”? Yep.
Meg, You’re very right. I enjoy reading from them every night, too.
Skier, Glad te gustas futbol. I don’t give-o mucho of a shit.
Rickey, I like cheese in the tub every month, but the rest of society (other than federal employees) could give a rat’s ass. It’s sad.
AvatG, It’s okay. You did make me feel a little guilty about the “cursing” ol’ Chris. I was just trying to poke some fun at him.
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October 5th, 2008 at 7:06 PM